west coast
by jynxhasadragon
Summary: in which ghedwin is fairly certain he's broken his hunter companion over a stupid offhand comment, and auaen might think a certain joke is a bit too funny. one-shot. rated t for mature humor.


Being Ikora's right-hand man had its perks, he had to admit. Such perks including, but not limited to, full access to her libraries, detailed reports on Vex activities, and, of course, free coffee.

Nothing could beat free coffee.

Or so the Warlock thought.

See, there weren't many things in life that had no downsides in addition to those perks. Maybe copper, because it could serve as a decent conductor and wasn't too poisonous. But copper didn't mix well with transitive detection, which sucked. Because copper was the only thing at hand at the moment.

Coffee had no downsides. Coffee was good all around.

Unfortunately, not everything is coffee, which means that pretty much everything sucked in one way or another. And, of course, Ghedwin-2 was in no mood to be dealing with his little problem.

Namely, his fireteam.

See, he hadn't really had a huge say in who was on his fireteam, being the Warlock Vanguard's second-in-command. Which meant he had been saddled with Hunter Auaen Sel and Titan Eldewhin Telenorr. Elde was fine, but Auaen—Auaen was a problem. A nuisance. Especially now, when Ghedwin had just received a sample of the spinmetal he had sought after for so long.

The Hunter was sprawled lazily across the ground, his cloak rumpled beneath him in his vaguely star-shaped pose. His helmet was cast aside and forgotten some four or five feet from where it should have been on his head. And he had tracked mud inside. Again.

Ghedwin suppressed a strangled groan when he saw the tracks. Thick, dirty mud in several splotches varying in moisture, all marking a clear trail to the Hunter. Auaen. Ghedwin opted for a sigh instead, praying he didn't sound too exasperated.

"How many times do I need to remind you, Auaen? Don't–"

"–track mud into the quarters, I _know_ ," the Hunter huffed. He didn't seem to be particularly jovial at the moment. Which wasn't a bad thing, really—Auaen was confusing enough as is. Some days, Ghedwin wondered how a man like Auaen had ended up as second-in-command. He was irresponsible, immature, and agonizingly annoying. Really, not the qualities one would look for in a Vanguard's assistant.

Or, in this case, the temporary Vanguard. At least, until they found a replacement for...for Cayde.

Ghedwin didn't want to think about it.

Auaen hadn't wanted to talk about it.

Eldewhin had never even hinted at it.

They needed a new Hunter Vanguard, and Auaen had not made the Dare. Thankfully, dare he say. He seemed to be managing more-or-less well enough to get by, at least. Commander Zavala had been more slack with the Hunter, letting him leave the Tower more often than he had Cayde. To cope, most likely. The Hunters' friendship had been no secret at the Tower.

Auaen sighed and kicked off his boots before tossing them messily into a closet and threading his way into their living quarters. Ghedwin sighed and resumed his work, now accompanied by the occasional crashing and clanking of his friend. A constant, quiet _fshhh_ of the faucet, then a soft _clink_ and then the _tik tik tik_ of the burner as Auaen started it up. The room went quiet for a moment, much to Ghedwin's comfort. At least he wasn't burning down their quarters. Again.

He absorbed himself in his experiment as he worked, gradually drowning out any outside noise as he slowly dripped the hadium solution onto the thin sheet of spinmetal. This required a delicate hand—too much hadium, and the spinmetal would corrode, too little and the bonding would be flawed and possibly become combustible. Which was not exactly _ideal_ , to be less than frank.

Eldewhin slipped in a few minutes later, dropping off a few more supplies Ikora had sent him as well as a few questions. A part of him wished the Awoken had turned out to be a Warlock—she would have made an excellent researcher. A shame she had ended up as a Titan, but she was well suited to her own role of Battle Master, second-in-command to Zavala.

Auaen—waltzed? marched? Ghedwin wasn't sure—into the room, plopping himself into a chair opposite to his Warlock companion. He held out a styrofoam cup of instant ramen for the Exo, simply shrugging and placing it on the corner of his desk when Ghedwin gave no physical response. He appreciated the gesture, but he wasn't hungry.

Auaen slung his feet over the edge of the loveseat, now clad in a black sweatshirt with the Hunter insignia and faded blue jeans. His black hair was a mess, and there was dirt smeared on his cheek. Typical.

He dug hungrily into his own meal, watching Ghedwin with a lazy gaze as he jotted down a few quick equations for future reference. He managed to keep his slurping to a minimum, but the minimum never was devoid of anything. Such was his sour though as a drop of broth landed on his faceplate.

Ghedwin sighed and placed the pen down, leaning back in his cheap folding chair and eyeing Auaen skeptically. "Has it become your life's goal to annoy me?" he asked sourly.

The Hunter simply smirked and continued to eat. Ghedwin was beginning to see the need of a change of tactics with the man. No, the boy. No man would act such a way, not even Cayde. To think he had manages to secure a reputation in the Crucible as one of the top arcatriders...!

Then again, maturity often had no direct correlation with Crucible success. Perhaps it was just Hunters in general. The Tower clowns, as a few Warlocks had dubbed them. A fitting title, when one saw how Auaen behaved.

Ghedwin huffed and left his desk, isolating the spinmetal inside a simple cryo-vacuum. A useful invention, that was certain. Auaen's smirk had not left his face. If anything, it had grown wider. The Hunter jabbed his chopsticks at the meal he had prepared for the Warlock.

"You gonna eat that?" he said, still holding his own close to his chest.

Ghedwin sighed and took a nice, long, contemplative stare towards the ceiling.

 _Traveler's Light, why me?_ he thought irritably. He waved his hand in declination after a moment, gesturing for Auaen to take it as he left. His smile widened as he stacked it within his cup and began his slurping once again.

Ghedwin wandered about their small living quarters for a while—they may be high in rank, but they still lived as Guardians—before deciding to settle down on his bed with a large book propped open in his lap. His Ghost, Riselle, was asleep on his pillow. He didn't disturb her. She was tired after his previous day spent in patrols on Venus.

There was silence for some time afterwards—Ghedwin wasn't sure how long specifically—before his sensors picked up the sound of boots in the hall. Quiet steps, from someone who knew what they were doing. He had gotten familiar with that sound.

Auaen poked his head inside the room, before wincing slightly and flicking the lights on. He wore his armor and cloak—which had apparently been cleaned some time earlier since he had eaten—but his hood still rested on his shoulders. He held his helmet in the crook of his arm.

"How do you read like that? It's so dark."

Ghedwin blinked once, twice before looking out towards the window. Auaen was right; the sky was a deep black, with the Moon cutting through the darkness and shining down on the City. The City itself was alight with activity, as per usual since the Traveler's reawakening. But it was, indeed, dark out.

"Anyways," Auaen continued, "I've been assigned a mission over in the EDZ, just FYI. Oh, and uh..."

Ghedwin looked over towards the Hunter, turning away from the view as he watched him shift uncomfortably.

"Yeah?"

"If Elde comes by later tonight, tell her where I am, 'kay?"

The Warlock watched Auaen with an investigating eye. "Why's that?" he asked after a moment. Eldewhin should be back soon—and besides, Auaen hadn't ever bothered to ask him to tell her such things before. Did they...?

Perhaps he was overthinking things. He shrugged and nodded after a moment, waving his hand in dismissal.

"Alright, I'll tell her. Don't get yourself killed, Riselle might get upset. Why she enjoys your company, I will never know."

The Hunter laughed at his comment, before turning to leave.

"Thanks, Ghed. Now, I gotta go fuck up some Cabal."

"Take some condoms, you don't want to run any risks in that field," Ghedwin joked.

Auaen froze, his face an unreadable mask, before a smile crept onto his face and he started to laugh.

"Did you...Did you just crack a _joke?"_ he laughed, biting his lip in an attempt to keep quiet. Riselle was still asleep, after all.

Ghedwin eyed him with a slightly confused air. Was he not allowed to do such a thing?

"...Yes? he said matter-of-factly. "Do you have a problem with that?"

Auaen was clutching his sides now, his face red with laughter. "You just– I said– And you...!"

Ghedwin watched the Hunter with a very, very confused gaze. Why was he laughing so hard at such an offhand comment? It was a simple joke; nothing very funny, really. Auaen simply laughed harder when he looked up towards the Warlock. Did he look funny to him? Since when did he care? Auaen was going to wake Riselle at this rate, and Ghedwin did not want that.

And, of course, that was the moment that Eldewhin decided to come back.

"Wh...?" she said with a questioning glance at their Hunter companion. She jabbed a finger at him. "Is he okay?"

Ghedwin shrugged. "I think I broke him."

It took them too long to calm him down after that, but in the end Auaen really did take a few condoms with him on his assignment. But Ghedwin did have to wonder—why did he have them in the first place?

Some things he felt he wouldn't ever understand.

At least coffee was simple.

Coffee was simple and beautiful.

~o:O:o~

 **so i wrote this kinda for fun instead of doing my math**

 **not sure how i feel abt it**

 **suffice it to say, i originally imagined having ghedwin cracking up and auaen to be smug in the background but**

 **things changed**

 **sorry for this mess of a stupid one shot and the corny joke**

 **cya**


End file.
